Gender Equality:  Is it only about men and women??

So much have already said and written about Gender Equality and other related terms like Feminism etc. and I am not going to do the same. What I feel is that most of the discussions end up in making this problem “Men vs. Women” and that is when we lose the grip on the actual problem and its probable solutions. It should be “Equality supporters” vs. “Inequality supporters”. We all talk about criminal activities against women (more oppressed gender and for longer time) and we must continue doing that but we should also not forget about the fake dowry cases, rape allegations and other misused laws.

We don’t want to create another oppressed gender in the process of fighting for equal rights for one gender. Do we??

I may have some bad experiences in past with men but does that makes me hopeless about all men??  Sure, I may be more conscious and sometimes, suspicious too, but not hopeless, for sure. Because I have seen my father, some of my male friends, my fiance and others through their writings and open public support for the cause, as examples of good men who challenged the so called norms in their own small or big way and created their own logical reasons to adopt those changes of ideas and thoughts.

Some two years back while travelling in a bus I had one different experience. Two old men were sitting on seats reserved for women. I and my friend standing just besides them heard a voice from behind…… “These are women seats”. We looked back and there were two healthy women asking those men (their father or uncle’s age) to leave the seats. Who needed those seats more?? 
If we are not ready to give up privileges, not even in required conditions. How can we expect men to give up privileges they enjoy in patriarchal structure?? My point is that it’s not only about gender alone. It is simply about mindset and personal gains.

While growing up, whenever I heard someone asking a young man, what qualities he expects in his life partner, the answers you gets were “beautiful, simple, homely, who respects me and my family or who can take care of my family and other similar stuff”. And these answers were from majority of men. But now if you ask, some of them would say probably – “a wise and an independent women”. 

A ray of hope!!  Isn’t???  Not all men but some of them and they do exist.

It's not only about men and women

But Gender equality is not only about men and women. Gender is fundamentally about what one chooses to identify as. In modern times, you can’t talk about gender equality without recognizing the other genders that exist (homosexual, bisexual, asexual and others). Transgender recognized but never given acceptance or equal rights. When we talk about gender equality, these all should be included.

As a society, we remain in state of denial for longer than the usual. Statements like “they don’t exist”, “this is a disease and can be cured by yoga”, “It’s unnatural and against our religion”. Irony is that this is probably the one subject on which all religions agree with each other. Even after so many reports of exploitation (physical and sexual) and blackmailing, we have put a blind eye on this.

We can’t even imagine the mental, emotional and social pressure they go through. In one of the interview a man said “ I, myself was not able to understand what was going within me, I had a body of male but a soul of female and he was just 14 or 15 by then. He continued…I was not able to share it with my parents and when I shared they were crying and asked me to keep it a secret”.

Who are we to decide if something is natural or unnatural?? We are having this amazing habit of opposing things/ subjects that we feel are inconvenient for us. Just read somewhere this amazing line which says “Don’t hate what you can’t understand”.

First time, when I saw a gay in a mall, my reactions were odd, not even realizing that I was staring at him. It was Independence Day and he taunts me with “And people are here to celebrate Independence Day”. I really felt bad but it was not intentional, I was not fully aware of other gender by then (2012) and so many people are still the same.

Many of us are still not giving them the right to live with dignity. Some of us mock them; make fun of them, not realizing that we are interfering in their private choices they made for themselves. We really need to evolve as a society. And it’s high time.

Even after legal recognition of third gender (only recognizing transgender, as clarified by the court) in all government forms, there is still no acceptance in the mainstream. Resignation of a transgender from the post of School Principal is the evidence of the same.

You can delay the change but you can never stop it. But more you delay it, more you have to pay for it.